Supervised Visits

So I just have to say the system sucks! Last night I had to go have my "intake" meeting with the supervisor place for Paul to have his visitations. As I sat there waiting for the lady I was to meet with it was in this dark hole of an office and I was a nervous wreck. Of course on the verge of tears I just kept picturing how nerve racking this was going to be for my kids to come to this place? They are suppose to have their first visit on Saturday. I can not even walk them into the building. Literally Paul has to park on one side of the building and arrive 10 min. early then I pull up to the curb on the other side and drop them off at the curb? So tell me how do you teach your 3 year old not to go to strangers and then expect her to go to a complete stranger with no anxiety? I don't understand? I'm trying to stay positive about this one and have had many of you tell me that "maybe this is what Mason will need for closure" or "Paul, will only do this once or twice because he has to pay $50 an hour." I know everyone has meant well by those comments but, that does not seem to help. If he does only show for one or two visits guess what I get to start back at square one with trying to get my kids adjusted to the idea of their father abandoning them AGAIN! It has taken me 2 1/2 years to get Mason especially adjusted to the point that he is today! So I am a bit irritated with this whole thing right now! Thank you to my mom, my good friend Jenn, and Marc who talked to me last night and calmed me down and even made me laugh. You are the best! Funny how I thought when I finally had papers signed this nightmare would be over? This custody, visitation thing is Crap! Even the supervisor last night said that 4 hours for the first visit was way too long! Especially for the 3 year old who still needs a nap during that time of day? She said she was going to try and talk to Paul and see if he will drop it to 2 hours at least for the first week? So this is where we will see if he will think of the kids needs first? Ha Ha, yeah right! He is fighting over 4 hours that he feels he lost last weekend due to the process not being in place. Wants me to give up one of my weekends or a holiday so he can have his 4 hours! Ummm, HELLO? Really you are going to argue over missing 4 hours with them what about the last 2 1/2 years????